Augoeides

Tuesday, April 30, 2013

As Bad as it Sounds

Brazilian evangelical pastor Valdeci Sobrino Picanto was recently arrested. His crime? Convincing his congregants that his penis contains "sacred milk." And yes, that's just as bad as it sounds. The British press can rail all it wants about allegations of OTO being a "sex cult," but the fact is that if anyone in the Order tried a stunt like this it would never go anywhere because they would be laughed out of the lodge. Or, if anything non-consensual occurred, expelled outright.

Picanto told his followers that the Holy Spirit would secrete from his penis in the form of “sacred milk“. This pastor said that his penis was blessed and that “the Lord had consecrated him with divine milk of the “Holy Spirit,” reports Vatican Crimes.

One of Picanto’s followers stated, “He convinced us that only God could come into our lives through our mouth and that’s why he would do what he did. Often, after worship, pastor Valdeci would take us to where the funds were kept at the back of the Church and asked us to have oral sex with him until the Holy Spirit would come through ejaculation.“

I suppose this constitutes a novel interpretation of Matthew 15:11 - "Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man; but that which cometh out of the mouth, this defileth a man." Seriously, though, where do churches find these people? Settlements related to sex abuse scandals have cost churches billions over the last decade or so. You would think at some point these pastors would just wise up and keep it in their pants.

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