Nicolas Cage: Immortal?

This photograph recently listed on eBay has been making the rounds through the blogosphere. According to Jack Mord, a dealer in antique images, the photograph is of actor Nicolas Cage, and constitutes proof that Cage is some sort of immortal undead creature. Of course, Mord is asking a million dollars for the otherwise old but ordinary photo, so how objective could he possibly be?

The eBay listing for the photo reads: 'Original c.1870 carte de visite [a type of small photograph] showing a man who looks exactly like Nick Cage.

'Personally, I believe it’s him and that he is some sort of walking undead / vampire... who quickens / reinvents himself once every 75 years or so.

'150 years from now, he might be a politician, the leader of a cult, or a talk show host.'

Morgan, meanwhile, weighed in yesterday with his own theory that rather than being a vampire, Cage is in fact an alchemist who has discovered some magical means of prolonging his life. Supporting Morgan's contention over Mord's is Cage's role as an ageless wizard in The Sorcerer's Apprentice and his producer role on The Dresden Files television series. And in fact, he very well could have been winking at the audience all the way through Vampire's Kiss - because, remember, in that film he didn't play an actual vampire, but rather a man suffering from some sort of vampire delusion.

Unfortunately for Jack Mord's million dollar payout, a close look at the face in the photo next to a picture of Cage reveals that while the two men have similar appearances they are not the same person. In the picture above from Metro, look where Cage's chin falls relative to that of the man in the antique photo. Adjusted so that their eyes are at the same level and their faces are of similar widths, you can see that Cage's face is much more oblong. Also, note the downward turn of the man in the antique photo's left ear. Both of Cage's ears lie flat against the sides of his head.

So the resemblance is most likely just a coincidence. It's also possible that this man might be a distant relative of Cage's, but sadly there's no way that he's an immortal.

Amish Men Arrested Over Safety Triangles

Religious groups like the Amish that aschew modern technology have always fascinated me, at least in part because I'm such a technophile myself and the worldview seems so foreign to me. Recently a group of Amish men in Kentucky were arrested because they refused to place orange safety triangles on their buggies, and then refused to pay the subsequent fines. The men claimed that the triangles violate their religious beliefs.

A judge sentenced them to between three and 10 days in jail by Graves District Court, Kentucky for non-payment of fines on religious grounds.

The men said paying the fines would amount to complying with a law they believe violates their beliefs against wearing bright colours or trusting in manmade symbols for their safety.

The sentences varied depending on individual fines and court costs, which ranged from $148 to more than $600.

In respect of the their religious beliefs, the jail ordered dark-coloured jumpsuits rather than the usual orange versions.

As you can see from the photograph above, Amish buggies are practically invisible on the road after dark without the reflective triangles, so it's easy to see why traffic laws require them. Even if these men aren't concerned about their own safety there are still other motorists to consider. And while they may not make use of modern technology in their personal lives, whenever they use a modern paved road they certainly are taking advantage of the better pavement that can be laid using current machines.

What I find confusing about the Amish worldview is that they don't live without any technology at all, but rather pick and choose based on what happened to be current in the late nineteenth century. Amish clothing is based on what would have been considered "plain" during that same period, but at least for men changing styles have meant that at times similar clothing has been considered the height of fashion. I personally own a white collarless shirt that when paired with a black jacket looks more fancy than wearing a brightly colored tie, not less. However, in many Amish communities it would be a completely acceptable outfit.

At any rate, I hope that some resolution to this situation can be found that will take into account these men's religious beliefs and still protect motorists from running into buggies after dark. Maybe large white reflectors? Those at least would not incorporate bright colors.

The World's Worst Noah's Ark

Take a look at the picture above. What is it? Part of a grain silo? A smokestack? Some kind of holding tank? Unless you guessed "Noah's Ark," you're flat-out wrong. A while back I reported on Johan Huibers, a Dutch man who has built an enormous replica of the Ark using the dimensions and instructions found in the Bible. This Ark, on the other hand, was cobbled together by a Chinese welder and turned out looking considerably less impressive.

Kho Jian, a metalworker from Louhe in Henan province, central China, is designing and building the craft using re-salvaged and converted oil tanks.

The 'Noah's Ark' will come at a cost of £20,000, and will be fitted with a range of mod-cons including a kitchen and bathrooms.

It will also use technology that is employed for space travel in order to keep it watertight - while also providing doors and windows.

'He believes we are heading for a world flood and he wants his own ark to save himself and his family,' said Kho, who aims to have the finished craft ready for delivery soon.

'He even wants wheels on it so he can tow it around and never has to risk being away from his ark for when the disaster comes.'

Here's the part I really don't understand. This thing is supposed to be 30 feet long and judging from the door in the image maybe 8-10 feet around. That's not very much space. 20,000 British pounds is about $30,000, and let me tell you, for that amount of money you can buy a used houseboat complete with trailer that's both bigger and a lot more comfortable. I know, because I was pricing them out last spring. So what's the point? If you want a boat and you have that much money sitting around, just buy a boat.

At the very least we can take comfort in the fact that China is nowhere near closing their Ark technology gap with the West.

The World's Most Famous Satanist?

For anyone out there still wondering whether or not Tyler Durden of Fight Club fame is a Luciferian figure, actor Brad Pitt spilled the beans at a recent press conference. Discussing his latest film, Pitt explained that he owes his success to a pact with the devil! Here's the actual quote:

"I related it more to my upbringing, I grew up in a very Christian environment -- a very healthy environment and a loving a family -- but there were parameters that I didn't understand, that I questioned it, and it took me until my adult years until I could really try new things... That was satanism, it works really well, I made a pact and the movie came out, so... No, you're really dealing with certain things as you grow up and you've got to try things on for yourself and really figure out what works for you and what doesn't. I just relate to that time, it's a very personal time, it's a comfort system and you cut the tether and find yourself very on your own with nothing to hold on to."

Now, as you can see Pitt quickly implied that he was joking, but come on, that's exactly what a real Satanist would do! Also, note that his serious answer, about finding what works for you and not worrying about having anything to hold on to, is pretty much straight-up Luciferian philosophy.

Satanist or not, Pitt is right about one thing - he's a huge star, so whatever he's doing indeed "works really well."

Another Damn Vampire

When I declared it to be shark-jumping season in vampire land it seems that I wasn't kidding. Three weeks ago a young man who claimed to be a 500-year-old vampire was arrested in Texas for attacking a woman and attempting to drink her blood. Now another vampire attack has been reported in Florida just in time, I suppose, for the True Blood season finale.

Milton Ellis, 69, told police in St. Petersburg, Florida, that he and Josephine Smith, 22, met on the street and went to the porch of a vacant restaurant to get out of the rain. He said he fell asleep in his motorized wheelchair and woke up to find Smith on top of him.

Ellis told authorities that she said, "I'm a vampire. I am going to eat you" and then began to bite him.

According to a police affidavit, Ellis was bitten on his arm and lips, leaving him bloody before he was able to escape and call police. He was later treated with stitches at a local hospital and released.

After arriving at the scene, police said they found Smith bloody and half-naked nearby, but that she had no memory of what happened and did not identify herself as a vampire, St. Petersburg Police spokesman Mike Puetz said.

I suppose it goes without saying that both the Texas man and this Florida woman are likely suffering from serious mental problems. Because they totally aren't vampires, at least not the sort who are centuries old and burn up in the sun. Some people who suffer from certain types of anemia do crave blood and sometimes describe themselves as vampires, but Dracula and the entire modern vampire genre it spawned are fiction only vaguely based on the original European vampire mythos. There's nothing undead about either of these two troubled individuals, and I hope that they can get some psychiatric help before they injure anyone else.

Now THAT'S Saturn!

Check out this awesome picture of Saturn taken by NASA's Cassini space probe. That's not CGI, it's what the planet Saturn really looks like from that particular angle, with the sun behind it illuminating the surrounding rings.

Taken by NASA's Cassini robotic orbiter, the shot was captured from the dark side of Saturn as the Sun's bright rays illuminated every piece of dust and debris circling the planet. Cassini has offered astronomers a never-before-seen look at Saturn and revealed more information about the planet than any craft before it. The craft has taken so many pictures of the ringed wonder that they were recently made into a short flyby film that looks like it was created by George Lucas rather than a robotic space explorer.

In Qabalistic magick Saturn is related to Binah, which encompasses both the vision of wonder and the vision of sorrow. It's considered both an astrological malefic and the lord of initiation. And in this picture you can see all that, and so much more. This is going to become my magical image of choice for years to come.

The Cassini probe was launched in 1997 and took a further 7 years to reach Saturn's orbit. The total cost of its overarching objective of studying the ringed planet stands at a staggering $3.26 billion. However, the wealth of information it has wrought — including amazing pictures like the one above, and recordings of massive lightning storms on the planet — have already made it one of the best investments in space exploration. Hopefully Juno — which began a 5-year trek to Jupiter just last month — will bring us some equally stunning shots of Saturn's neighbor.

Let's just say that I'm really looking forward to seeing those photos of Jupiter, as they promise to be similarly remarkable.

Ghana's "Witch Camps" Disbanding

On the issue of witchcraft persecutions many parts of Africa are still struggling to pull themselves into the 21st Century. One of these is the nation of Ghana, which for years has operated what are essentially concentration camps for accused witches. Most of the unfortunates who have been sent to the camps are simply the same poor or elderly women on whom suspicion generally falls across Africa, India, and other parts of the world in which such accusations are common. In a positive development, the government of Ghana is finally taking steps to disband these camps and release the prisoners housed there.

Government will soon disband all witches camps in the country. That’s according to Chief Psychiatrist Dr. Akwasi Osei.

He says the practice of confining elderly women who are banned from their communities to such camps infringes on their human rights.

His comments come on the heels of similar calls by Deputy Women and Children’s Affairs Minister Hawa Gariba.

The minister, who toured the Nyani “Witches” camp near Yendi in the Northern Region recently, described the camps as a national disaster.

Chief Psychiatrist Dr. Akwasi Osei told Joy News a national conference will be convened next week to address the issue.

Vampires at Sea

In my last post about vampires I commented that their trend is due to reverse any time now. Here's more proof - a vampire cruise! Talk about cashing in on the fad! Cruises are expensive, but apparently there's enough demand out there to organize such an excursion. I thought I remembered something about vampires and running water, but maybe that only applies to fresh water. After all, Dracula traveled by sea to England in Bram Stoker's famous novel.

Hundreds of vampire enthusiasts will sail Alaska's fabled Inside Passage in a summer 2012 cruise tailored to their interests that combines gazing at glaciers with a late-night costume ball, organizers said on Thursday.

The "Vamps at Sea" cruise is scheduled for late June, which is a time of near-constant daylight in the far north.

"They've got curtains and they can block everything out -- so it can be as dark as we want it," said organizer Linda Wolf, president of Los Angeles-based agency Cruises Cruises Cruises Inc, who is herself a fan of the vampire genre.

Is it just me, or does this sound like the worst possible time for vampires to be on a ship? Near-total daylight? You would think they'd want to do it the other way around, traveling in the winter when there's near-total darkness. After all, vampires are impervious to cold.

Still, the Vamps at Sea cruise promises to be special, said Buckwheat Donahue, executive director of the convention and visitors bureau in Skagway, a historic gold rush town that is on most cruise itineraries.

"This is going to be fun," Donahue said. "I can't imagine what people are going to be dressed like coming off the boat."

The group will sail on a Holland America ship, the Zuiderdam, and will hit the usual ports of call such as Juneau, Glacier Bay and Ketchikan.

But there will be other special features, including a late-night costume ball, a scavenger hunt and a vampire talent show, Wolf said. There is also a literary angle to the cruise, with vampire-genre authors scheduled to speak, including a relative of the late "Dracula" writer Bram Stoker, according to the cruise website.

As an author, let me just say that the concept of a vampire named "Buckwheat" is both silly and awesome in so many ways. I may have to use that in a story at some point. As far as the cruise goes, some of the events sound interesting to me as I am a fan of the literary vampire genre, but doing them in the company of a bunch of people who are running around in goofy goth makeup and constantly asking if they can bite my neck makes the whole thing sound like a lot less fun than it might be otherwise.