Drunken Exorcism?

I never thought I would come across an exorcism story that would make me wish the Teen Exorcist Squad was performing it instead of the actual would-be exorcist, but I suppose there's a first time for everything. A Florida man was recently arrested for performing a two-day exorcism on his girlfriend while so drunk he later claimed not to remember any of it.

The alleged exorcism began on Monday when Benes held down his girlfriend and tried “to get the devil out of her.” He then took the batteries out of her phone to keep her from calling for help. After, he took her car keys and “dismantled” the garage to prevent it from opening. Then, somehow, the victim fell asleep.

When she woke the next morning, the alleged exorcism began again and when the authorities arrived (the woman somehow managed to call 911), they found the bruised and scratched woman sitting outside the home crying. Benes was on the couch and “too drunk to remember what happened.” He then told the officers his girlfriend started the fight because “she is crazy.”

Kudos to police for getting this drunken exorcist off the street. He sounds like a deeply stupid and abusive fellow, not to mention a problem alcoholic with the blackouts and all. One wonders what on earth prompted him to think he would be able to perform an effective exorcism in the first place.