Stuffed Lion Provides Bad Legal Advice

Some stories are so ridiculous I can't help but share them. According to this article from the Edmonton Journal, a "religiously extreme" Christian couple lost custody of a child after they refused legal aid and instead accepted the assistance of a stuffed lion that they believe came "directly from God." There's that old saying - a person who acts as their own attorney has a fool for a client. But what about a person who lets a stuffed lion act as their attorney? Clearly, it did not prove to be a winning legal strategy.

After the woman found she was pregnant, she told a social worker her husband sometimes choked her to make her stop crying, had once tied her hands and covered her mouth with tape, which scared her, and occasionally beat her, court heard. She told the worker her husband grew up in a cult and believes sexual relations between children should be encouraged and that they “role-play” sins where she plays the victim and he plays the perpetrator, court heard.

When interviewed by police about the allegations, she denied them. Her husband said that once, when he was frustrated with her and had had a few drinks, he put one hand over her throat and the other over her mouth. This led to a complaint to the Ministry of Children and Family Development. It appears that, due to their strong religious beliefs, they are intolerant of those who do not espouse identical views. This includes other Christians.

After the birth of their daughter, the parents refused all medical tests and procedures for her, including a hearing test, blood test, eye drops and a vitamin K shot. The mother also said she was unwilling to have her vaccinated. Because of concerns over family violence and mental health, the ministry monitored the family. The couple refused to have parental capacity assessments, despite a court order.


A month after the girl’s birth, she was removed from the home and the parents continued to have supervised access. The mother applied to change her daughter’s name to Jesus JoyoftheLord and her own first name to Risen Lord Jesus, her middle name to Refinersfire and her last name to Christ (with a hyphenation including her real name.)

When their child custody case came to court, the couple refused legal aid. They said they had legal help, however, which came in the formed of a stuffed lion. During trial, the couple spoke to the lion in non-discernible words, presented as “speaking in tongues,” and said that through the lion they heard directly from God. They said Jesus Christ was their “lawyer, witness and judge.” When they cross-examined witnesses, they told each witness that their lawyer Jesus was asking the questions through them.

And I have to ask. Does literally anybody out there think this could have been a good idea? Does God normally speak to his followers through stuffed animals? I have to say, I know the Bible pretty well and I don't remember seeing anything in there that might justify that belief. But then, the husband allegedly grew up in a cult. Was this a cult that might have worshipped God in the form of a stuffed lion?

It seems to me that from a mainstream Christian perspective this is rapidly moving into Golden Calf territory. Then again, maybe that's why they don't get along with other Christians who refuse to worship idols - or something like that.