Friday, June 30, 2017

No Child Slaves on Mars

I know that I said a while back I was going to lay off Alex Jones, but this story is just too good. According to Robert David Steele, who recently appeared as a guest on Jones' program, NASA is kidnapping children and sending them to work as slaves on Mars. NASA, of course, denies the allegations - you know, because they aren't even possible given our current level of space travel technology.

A report on Alex Jones’ InfoWars claiming child sex slaves have been kidnapped and shipped to Mars is untrue, NASA told The Daily Beast on Thursday.

“There are no humans on Mars. There are active rovers on Mars. There was a rumor going around last week that there weren’t. There are,” Guy Webster, a spokesperson for Mars exploration at NASA, told The Daily Beast. “But there are no humans.”

On Thursday’s program, the InfoWars host welcomed guest Robert David Steele onto The Alex Jones Show, which airs on 118 radio stations nationwide, to talk about kidnapped children he said have been sent on a two-decade mission to space.

“We actually believe that there is a colony on Mars that is populated by children who were kidnapped and sent into space on a 20-year ride,” said Steele. “So that once they get to Mars they have no alternative but to be slaves on the Mars colony.”

Now I know Jones' motto is "investigate everything," but come on. Steele obviously has a screw or two loose, or is just trolling to get publicity. Seeing as we don't even have a spacecraft that can get humans to Mars yet, the idea that there's any sort of colony there is ridiculous. If there's no colony, they don't need slaves. And if they don't need slaves, they don't need child slaves. And so on. There's this thing called "logic" that too many people still lose sight of.

Critical thinking teaches us that if something is not technologically possible, it just isn't happening. Jones might as well investigate my claim of having an interstellar star cruiser based on the Alcubierre warp drive system that brings me exotic fruits and vegetables from other star systems. Or maybe I use it to mine precious metals from asteroids, or to defend Earth from the space alien menace.

Do you think if I started proclaiming that everywhere I could get on the program, too? I sure hope not, because the whole idea is just as silly as a Martian colony of child slaves.

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